Am I Really That Easy To Let Go Of?

ImageSo here we are one whole week later and still…nothing.

I’m not sure what to think or do at this point, besides wanting to slap the shit out of the Russian. As I should have known he has pulled his infamous disappearing act on me again. You would think I’d know better, at least I was expecting it this time around. One of these days I’ll learn my lesson when it comes to men like him.

I recently found a house that I absolutely adore and want. So we will see how that progresses. Things with the boyfriend are slowly getting worse; he had gone out Friday night and stayed out the entire night. Not getting back to the house till 9 am the next day. I decided to go to my parents’ house and this had been planned for a few days. I just had to get away from him and the house. It was nice just getting away and thinking. He did clean the house some on Sunday which was nice, but when I got home we immediately got into an argument and he went into one room to watch TV and I stayed in the living room.

Yesterday was St. Patty’s Day and since I’ll be going out of town today and not returning till late on Wednesday I had decided to just stay home and try to spend time with him. He wanted to go out to a bar I hate, even after I told him I wanted to spend time with him. He went out and didn’t get home till a little after midnight.


I’m happy I’ll be leaving work soon and not coming in tomorrow. I can continue playing my avoid the Russian game and the boyfriend. I almost had a run in with him this morning and he did see me. But I just waited in my car for a few minutes before I walked into the office.

Very mature of me right? Ugh.

Lesson learned; don’t sleep with your coworker. Especially if they are going to continue playing with you, leading you and then acting like you don’t fucking exist.

I also have a feeling this will be the way I act when he tries and approaches me again, which I know we all can agree with, he will:



And the Clock Keeps Ticking….


Wow, it has been a while since I last blogged! With the craziness of the holidays, work and my birthday I think time just slipped away. Well, when we last discussed what was going on the Russian was still very random with his conversations with me. Well, the week of Christmas he spoke to me the most he has in well over a month. I unfortunately lost a close family friend over the holidays and he found out about and told me he was here for me if I needed him, which of course, I didn’t go to him for any kind of comforting. Then on Christmas day he sent me a “Merry Christmas!” text, which in response I just sent the same thing to him.

Well the next day I was off from work that afternoon and our conversation went like his:

Him: “Anyone at work today?”

Me: “I left at 12. It was literally a ghost town.”

Him: “I’m almost there.”

Me: “I went this morning and was bored out of my mind.”

Him: “I had 1 vacation day left so I figured two halves would be more bearable. I was going crazy Monday.”

Him: “Have you seen the Hobbit yet?”

Me: “I had a half day today and then I took tomorrow off.”

Me: “No I haven’t seen it yet.”

Him: “That’s right, you haven’t seen the first one huh?”

Me: “No, I think this on will be more interesting though. The other one put me to sleep.”

Him: “I’m shocked!”

Me: “Why?”

Him: “I loved the first one…and I thought you shared good movie judgment!”

Me: “I have excellent movie judgment! I guess I didn’t give it a fair chance and just fell asleep lol.”

Him: “That I can live with”

Me: “Oh I’m so relieved.”

Him: (He sends this like grumpy face emoji)

Me: (I send the sly face emoji)

Him: “Don’t give me that sly look.”

Me: “I believe I already did.”

Him: “You heard me”

Me: (I then sent my glare emoji)

Alright so that was our conversation Thursday. Now let me say in my own defense, I have an amazing taste in movies. My personal movie collection is vast and absolutely amazing. I had attempted to watch the Hobbit late one night and just all the brightness and cheerfulness of it kind of bored me a little bit. So I fell asleep. I know it probably gets better and that I’ll love it. I just wanted to clear that up!!

Well the next day he told me “Happy Birthday!!” and I just sent back a thank you text. I figured that would be that for the day. Well to my surprise it wasn’t.

Him: (He sends me this funny picture)

Me: “Hahaha that’s awesome”

Him: “Funny enough for a rare fb post lol”

Me: “Lol that’s true. Is that in town?”

Him: “Yeah ____”

Me: “Figures lol”

Him: “Reallllly funny!”

Me: “It’s pretty hilarious!”

Him: “Birthday plans?”

Me: “I haven’t really thought of anything big besides going somewhere to drink.”

Him: “We may try Sully’s and Stand.”

Me: “I haven’t been to Stand yet. Is it any good?”

Him: “Heard it was but I haven’t been inside”

Me: “I never go uptown anymore so I forget about those places.”

Him: “I’m tired of the usual places and smoke.”

Him: “_____ smoke blows”

Me: “Oh I refuse to go anywhere smoky, it’s just gross.”

Him: “Same for me”

Him: “Where do you go?”

Now at this point in the conversation I’m starting to get curious. Because we have discussed bars and hangout places early on when we were getting to know each other.

Me: “It’s been usually JJs but I got tired of it. And I cant be in smoky bars cause I’ve been sick.”

Me: “Otherwise I can kind of stand smoky places if they aren’t packed.”

Him: “Shitty choices we have”

Me: “Yep, the joys of a boring city.”

Him: “I haven’t been to that new Indian place yet.”

Me: “It’s pretty cool, the food kind of sucks.”

And that was the end of that conversation for the day. Well that night I went out for dinner and drinks with several of my friends. I had a pretty good time, lots of laughs and inappropriate jokes. The next day goes by and I go out to one of the places he mentioned he was going to the night before. I was a little weary of running into him. Especially since the boyfriend does kind of know him, not on a friend basis but just through other people. Thankfully, no run ins and the night goes on without any problems.

The next morning the boyfriend and I get up to go get breakfast. As soon as I sit down my phone goes off.

Him: “How was your bday? Where’d ya go?”

Me: “It was a good one. I just wanted to do dinner and drinks Friday, my best friend had to work the next do. And then last night I went to Sully’s.”

Him: “Sounds like a good weekend. My buddy and I went to _____ Friday night til about 10 then Stand, Sully’s and another bar. Last night I just watched the game.”

(Also, we apparently were at the same resturant Friday night. I’m not sure if he saw me or not but I didn’t see him there so he probably didn’t. Which is a shame because, not to be full of myself, but I looked smoking hot that night.)

Him: (He sends me a picture)

Me: I heard about that, didn’t a guy break something?”

Him: You didn’t see the pic I sent?”

Me: “I just did haha that looks pretty fucking painful.”

Him: “His foot is 90 degrees out of place”

Him: “Snap!”

Me: “I’m sure he immediately regretted that decision lol”

Him: “Uh yeah lol”

Me: “Lol I would like to have seen his face as that shit was happening”

Him: “He was screaming and it was flopping around”

Me: “Oh gross lol so apparently the do kick fairly hard”

Him: “We were all screaming lol it was pretty gnarly”

Me: “I would imagine so lol the idea of that makes me cringe”

And there you go people. That was about a day and a half ago, since then I haven’t heard from him. I’m not sure if he is just talking to me to be nice or if he is attempting to get back into my good graces again. In all honesty it is nice speaking to him because we had good conversations together and got on really well.

Oh and for those who have been following this saga and are wondering about my movies I still have not gotten those back, I mentioned this to my mum and she told me just to go buy some more. If you didn’t guess she is not his biggest fan at the moment.

Things with the boyfriend are exactly the same. He really upset me when I told him my family friend passed away I got pretty sad and almost started crying in public. He told me to just stop and have fun because he wasn’t ready to leave the bar yet. I finally put my foot down and said I wanted to go home that I couldn’t stay in public like this. Granted, he was kinder when we got home but just the fact he didn’t understand to just bring me home then really bothers me.

Truthfully, I know the reason I haven’t just left him is because I’m simply terrified of being alone. It is such a petty fear but it is very true. Who wants to be alone? Plus, I obviously have terrible judgment when it comes to men.

Since the holidays are finally over I can keep everything more up to date than I have been! Until then, take care and have a Happy New Year!!